The 12 Days of NaNo

November is National Novel Writing Month, or NaNoWriMo. If you’ve never heard of NaNo, as it’s commonly referred to, check it out here. The goal is to get 50,000 words down on paper in the month of November. It’s November 20th as I write this, and, well, let’s just say I’m not on track to hit that number.

At the rate I’m going, I’ll hit my NaNo word count maybe 12 days this month. Are you in the same sinking boat? Take heart! I’ve written a little parody to cheer up all of us NaNo-not-quites. I combined my NaNo failure with the excitement of the upcoming holidays. I present to you…

The 12 Days of NaNo (Note: In writer world, MS = manuscript.)

On the first day of Nano

I managed to achieve

an outline of an MS.

On the second day of NaNo

I managed to achieve

two hundred words

and an outline of an MS.

On the third day of NaNo

I managed to achieve

three lame scenes,

two hundred words,

and an outline of an MS.

On the fourth day of NaNo

I managed to achieve

four storylines,

three lame scenes,

two hundred words,

and an outline of an MS.

On the fifth day of NaNo

I managed to achieve

five gaping plot holes!

Four storylines,

three lame scenes,

two hundred words,

and an outline of an MS.

On the sixth day of NaNo

I managed to achieve

six pencils snapping,

five gaping plot holes!

Four storylines,

three lame scenes,

two hundred words,

and an outline of an MS.

On the seventh day of NaNo

I managed to achieve

seven corrupted files,

six pencils snapping,

five gaping plot holes!

Four storylines,

three lame scenes,

two hundred words,

and an outline of an MS.

On the eighth day of NaNo

I managed to achieve eight splitting headaches,

seven corrupted files,

six pencils snapping,

five gaping plot holes!

Four storylines,

three lame scenes,

two hundred words,

and an outline of an MS.

On the ninth day of NaNo

I managed to achieve nine pacing issues,

eight splitting headaches,

seven corrupted files,

six pencils snapping,

five gaping plot holes!

Four storylines,

three lame scenes,

two hundred words,

and an outline of an MS.

On the tenth day of NaNo

I managed to achieve ten cries for mercy,

nine pacing issues,

eight splitting headaches,

seven corrupted files,

six pencils snapping,

five gaping plot holes!

Four storylines,

three lame scenes,

two hundred words,

and an outline of an MS.

On the eleventh day of NaNo

I managed to achieve

eleven whispered swear words,

ten cries for mercy,

nine pacing issues,

eight splitting headaches,

seven corrupted files,

six pencils snapping,

five gaping plot holes!

Four storylines,

three lame scenes,

two hundred words,

and an outline of an MS.

On the twelfth day of NaNo

I managed to achieve twelve shots of vodka,

eleven whispered swear words,

ten cries for mercy,

nine pacing issues,

eight splitting headaches,

seven corrupted files,

six pencils snapping,

five gaping plot holes!

Four storylines,

three lame scenes,

two hundred words,

and an outline of an MS!

Even if you didn’t “win” NaNo this year, you can share what you did accomplish below, and we’ll celebrate with you! There’s always next year!

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